We have all done it and probably will do it again sometime in our not-to-distant future.
Feeling sorry for yourself. If you're like me then the reason you feel sorry for yourself is because it feels good. When you feel sorry for yourself what you are really telling yourself is that you are a better person than the situation that has been dealt to you. And that is a very arrogant way of thinking.
It would be a better attitude for us to think 'Damn, I didn't get that job. Better luck next time'. The trouble comes when something really hard happens and we chose to stop and milk it for attention. There is no progress in that and it gets us nowhere. It can also be quite annoying.
When you go to the gym. You are not building your muscles. You are literally tearing them down. When you lift weights you are doing damage to your muscles. The reason your muscles grow is because your body goes into repair mode so that next time you lift the weight, it won't hurt.
It is like that with our emotions too.
Once we experience something hard. It tears us down and really hurts.
We screw up and embarrass ourselves or lose a job and have no money. But honestly, there is not a bad thing that won't return a greater blessing. We will always come out stronger and life will throw a lot of pain at you, to the point where you think it is all a joke.
But why shouldn't we feel sorry for ourselves?
We shouldn't feel sorry for ourselves because it stops us from gaining that emotional muscle. We can either have the blessing of a stronger character or the instant gratification of self-pity.
What we have to do instead is to ask ourselves what we can learn from the situation.
If it was our fault, we have to take ownership of what we did.
If it wasn't our fault, then we have to realise that there are no flowers without rain.
